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After the murder of his father, young Arthur's power-hungry uncle Vortigern seizes control of the crown. Robbed of his birthright, Arthur grows up on the streets of Londinium with no idea if he’s the rightful ruler of England. Then, after pulling a mystical sword from a stone, he joins a band of outlaws to take on the king.
Director Guy Ritchie can turn London crime dramas into cinematic lightning, but apply his fast cuts and jagged pacing to the Arthurian legend and you get, well, a brutal, bleedin' mess.
Ritchie has gleefully set his timeworn characters in an environment where narrative logic has no purchase. One name for this environment is subconscious dreamscape. Another is mosh pit.
Guy Ritchie's reimagining of the King Arthur legend manages to be both action-packed and yet utterly mind-numbing, with a two-hour running time that feels endless.
To that hallowed list of great expensive follies - "John Carter," "Ishtar," "Heaven's Gate" - let us ceremonially add another name: "King Arthur: Legend of the Sword."