Celebrities John Mayer, Birthday: 16 October 1977, Bridgeport, Connecticut, USA

Ladies, if you want to know the way to my heart...good spelling and good grammar, good punctuation, ...Show more »

Ladies, if you want to know the way to my heart...good spelling and good grammar, good punctuation, capitalize only where you are supposed to capitalize, it's done. Show less «

[As he ties his shoe onstage] "It's very difficult to tie one shoe with the same tension as the othe...Show more »

[As he ties his shoe onstage] "It's very difficult to tie one shoe with the same tension as the other one, because if one should be a little tighter than the other, the show's gonna suck. I'm a man of symmetry." Show less «

I am beginning to know what it feels like to be a woman. To have people looking at you all the time....Show more »

I am beginning to know what it feels like to be a woman. To have people looking at you all the time. And I'm sorry ladies, I had no idea! But people are looking at me all the time. It's like I have musical boobies! Show less «

I love coconut, because when you think you're done eating coconut, 25 minutes later, a little piece ...Show more »

I love coconut, because when you think you're done eating coconut, 25 minutes later, a little piece of coconut comes out of the back of your mouth, and then you say, "Hey! It's more coconut!" I think any food with that kind of determination needs a little respect. Show less «

[crowd cheers] "That was a good response and I'm not going to ask you to do it again. There's nothin...Show more »

[crowd cheers] "That was a good response and I'm not going to ask you to do it again. There's nothing I hate more than going to a concert and the guy says 'You having a good time?' and you scream your head off and then the guy says 'I can't hear you!' and I'm like 'The fuck you can't!' I absolutely hate it when guys do that. So I promise you I'll never make you do that. If you scream respectably the first time anyway." Show less «

[on recording the duet, "Who You Love", with Katy Perry] I had this little chorus for years. And it ...Show more »

[on recording the duet, "Who You Love", with Katy Perry] I had this little chorus for years. And it was 'You love who you love' and I thought that was always going to be a great thing someday to have a song that people could hear and feel that sort of permission. And then it came out again and sometimes you just have to play stuff for other people... And I played it for Don Was, the producer of the record, and he went, 'That's something' and I said, 'I don't know' and then he said, 'Why don't you get Katy to do it?' And my first thought was, 'You can't do that' and then the more I thought about just the music part of it, it made perfect sense. Even if I didn't know Katy, it would have made perfect sense... For me, it always had to be about the song. It's a pretty big moving target to be a couple and have a song but I think there's an authenticity to it when you hear it. Show less «

I'm not really good at keeping my own secrets. I can keep other people's secrets pretty well. Unless...Show more »

I'm not really good at keeping my own secrets. I can keep other people's secrets pretty well. Unless they're really good and people deserve to hear them. And I'll disseminate the information accordingly. Show less «

High school is like a spork: its a crappy spoon AND a crappy fork, so in the end, its just plain use...Show more »

High school is like a spork: its a crappy spoon AND a crappy fork, so in the end, its just plain useless. Show less «

It's almost charity work, what people have done, turning other people on to my music.

If I look a little heavier these days it's because I'm bulking up for a role. I'm playing a musician...Show more »

If I look a little heavier these days it's because I'm bulking up for a role. I'm playing a musician on tour who eats everything in sight while hardly exercising. Show less «

I get recognized somewhere in between like local meteorologist and national meteorologist

About the xBox game 'Halo': "I'm good. I'm fierce. And I'm not some gaming overachiever. I just have...Show more »

About the xBox game 'Halo': "I'm good. I'm fierce. And I'm not some gaming overachiever. I just have a skill. I was born to kill bionically augmented men." Show less «

I've realized you can use a fork as a spoon if you use it rapidly enough.

Love is a hot shower where your skin never prunes.

I love you all so much. We really need to come up with a new name for 'fans'. How about really good ...Show more »

I love you all so much. We really need to come up with a new name for 'fans'. How about really good friends who can't come over my house. Show less «

I'm half Jewish. People say, 'Well, which side of your family is Jewish?' I say, 'My dad's.' And the...Show more »

I'm half Jewish. People say, 'Well, which side of your family is Jewish?' I say, 'My dad's.' And they always say it doesn't count. But I will say I keep my pool at 92 degrees, so you do the math. I find myself relating to Judaism. One of my best friends is Jewish beyond all Jews-I went to my first Passover seder at his house- and I train in Krav Maga with a lot of Israelis. Show less «

I don't mind making sissy rock... I'll rock your ass sensitive-style

I've always said I've got the coolest fans, and I brag about you like grandchildren when I talk to o...Show more »

I've always said I've got the coolest fans, and I brag about you like grandchildren when I talk to other artists Show less «

Connecticut's where I built the parts, Boston's where I assembled them, and Atlanta is where I sold ...Show more »

Connecticut's where I built the parts, Boston's where I assembled them, and Atlanta is where I sold them to people. Show less «

So we've got one more song to play for you tonight...[crowd grumbles]...what, you know there's an en...Show more »

So we've got one more song to play for you tonight...[crowd grumbles]...what, you know there's an encore too. The encore is sort of like the condom in the pocket: everybody knows it's there but nobody talks about it. Show less «

[observation, 2013] I'd like to get to that point where people go, 'You've got a really good sound'....Show more »

[observation, 2013] I'd like to get to that point where people go, 'You've got a really good sound'. There are certain songs from the past that don't fit in that sound right now, and I'm working overtime to write more songs that do. Show less «

John Mayer

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